I’m Not In The Position To Right Now- Part 3, by D.D.


I/we Will Hunt!

You answer, “My brother knows how to hunt!” You’re not in a position to learn or keep your skills up-to-date, but you think he will do it for you. I live in Florida, so let me give you the numbers for my state. There are approximately 20,271,272 people in the state of Florida. If half of one percent of the people in Florida survived a major catastrophe (that’s a death rate of 99.5%), there would be 101,356 people left or 1.5 people per square mile! Doing some research on primitive living, I read that it takes about 10 square miles for a single person to live off the land with hunting and foraging. This is to not deplete the land of animals and plants in a non-recoverable way. With 1.5 people per square mile left, not all of which is food producing (cities), you will have almost 6.5 times the number of people per square mile. That many people will blow through every squirrel, deer, chipmunk, and sparrow they can get their hands on. That many people cannot be environmentally conscious and still eat. You are looking at the eradication of species. That many people survive in such a small space because of modern trucking and shipping. Tons of food is brought in every single day. Remember that is 0.5% still around if everyone else just suddenly dropped dead. Those numbers don’t include the damage that will be done getting down to that final number; when the emergency starts, the population will be at its maximum.

Remember that during the Great Depression many people starved to death, and those people were a lot more rural than you are today. They had far more of the mind and skills for living off the land, farming, preserving, and canning. There were a lot more farmers then than now, and still many thousands died. Of those that died, do you think some of them had a farm to run to in a time when there were a lot more farms? Native Americans throughout history had times of starvation and depopulation. They could eat trees, had a community to support them, were born to that way of living, and still they died in large numbers. You think you’re going to run to someone else knowing nothing, with nothing, and still you’re going to be “fine”? You’re “not in any kind of position to right now” as far as preparing.

I’m reminded of a conversation I had with my ex-wife. We have two children who live with her in one of the biggest cities in Florida. I mentioned to her about having a few things put away, such as food, in case there were problems with supply. I told her about grocery stores being cleaned out at an alarming speed, the possibility of looters, et cetera. Her response to all of this was that she “was not in a position to prepare right now” and would “go into the woods to hunt deer and provide food”. I was stunned when she said this, although I should not have been. She is very overweight and out of shape, although she claims to be “working on it”. I asked her where the “woods” were. She waved in the general direction of a city park.

Here is my reply to her: Okay, let’s say that everything goes South and you can’t buy food. Figuring that the whole family isn’t spread out all over the city between school and work, and everyone just happens to be all at home, the first thing I suspect you’re going to do is sit in your house for days while two adults and four kids (two are his) are plowing through what you have in the kitchen. Let’s pretend you have enough food to feed that many people something decently healthy for three days, though you don’t. Let’s also pretend that you have water to drink it with, which we both know you don’t, and you’re not chewing on the dry noodles and colored yellow powder that comes in a box of macaroni and cheese, which you can’t boil without power, without fuel, and without ever having lit a fire in your life. I imagine that you’ll sit there waiting for someone, such as the government, to come help you for another few days. We’ll pretend that you aren’t dead or close to death after three days without water, or that you are not sick from drinking from questionable sources. Let’s just say that all of this happens at the best time of the year with nice, mild weather. Now, you decide that you must “Go into the woods to hunt deer and provide food”. You’re going to grab the only gun you own, which is a 9mm Glock pistol, put on something other than the “ghastly earth tones you despise and don’t own”, and the sensible ladies career shoes you wear to your job at the bank. You will now set out for the woods that you couldn’t point to on a map and that has deer. Since you live in one of the largest cities in Florida, you’re going to have to walk because the roads are jammed or blocked. Let’s pretend that you aren’t set upon by looters or mobs of criminals who are just as desperate as you are. Let’s pretend they ignore that nice Glock you have, since you don’t have a holster and the one extra magazine you own is in your purse, which they won’t notice, either. You live, as-the-crow-flies, almost fifteen miles to the edge of the city. Let’s pretend that the woods are on the edge of the city and let’s also pretend that you only have to walk the distance as a crow would fly. So you walk through the broken and desperate city full of looters and criminals for an entire fifteen miles in those sensible shoes. Let’s pretend that you could do that in the shape you’re in. You miraculously make it to the edge of the city, where we will also pretend are the “woods with deer”. After this fifteen mile stroll through the park, let’s imagine you won’t be thirsty, and of course you’ll have been well fed and hydrated when you left. Let’s just say that no one else had this brilliant idea in a city whose population is over 850,000 and who haven’t eaten or scared off every single animal available, least of all the low-hanging fruit, which are deer right on the edge of the city. We all know that experienced hunters never come back empty handed, so you shouldn’t either, even though you’ve never hunted before. Let’s pretend that ten feet into the woods is a decent-sized deer standing there waiting for you to kill it. You take careful aim, calling on the training you last practiced years ago, and we’ll just say you drop it cleanly with a single shot. We’ll pretend that it didn’t move, you actually hit it, the wound inflicted was mortal, and it didn’t run off needing to be tracked. It just lays down and dies on the spot. Let’s pretend that no one heard that shot and no one is coming to investigate. The sharpest knife you own is stainless steel kitchen knife with which you have trouble getting through a tomato cleanly, but let’s just say you happen to have a razor sharp knife and won’t be sawing through hair and hide with what is basically a large butter knife. Let’s pretend you thought to bring it. So you chop up this deer without having a clue as to how it’s done, but hey anyone can get some meat out of it, right? We’ll say you didn’t spoil anything by doing something like punching through the bladder and spoiling the meat, since you can’t so much as rinse it with the water you don’t have. You don’t own a day backpack or any backpack, but let’s just pretend that you do and that it will support some decent weight. I don’t think you could carry 10 pounds of anything on your back, but let’s just say you bag 50 pounds of meat, put it in your pack, and head home. So now we’ll pretend that you can walk, dehydration and undernourishment aside, another 15 miles as-the-crow-flies back through the city of looters and criminals, for a total of 30 miles in aday, the second half of which you were carrying a load and without a drop to drink. So you make it back home, the place you left having taken the only gun in the house, where everyone applauds your return. Further pretending that you somehow cook this meat (the smell of which didn’t attract a single person in a starving city of 850,000), there is no problem digesting a 100% meat diet without water, and everyone eats their fill for an entire week because of the fact that you can’t preserve it. Then you will have to go do all of that again. I asked her, “So your plan is to go hunting every week?”.

She then walked away from me.

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