Mr. Rawles,
Thank you for the time and energy spent on your blog and your books. I read your blog and static pages often and own most of your books. Your writings offer a deep perspective not often found.
Your writer from Idaho has hit on one of the most debated topics that has ever been discussed between a man and his wife. How does a man prepare his family without frightening, boring or going overboard?
I’ll tell you what has worked in my family. The most important point is to bring your spouse on board, slowly. Rome wasn’t built in a day and either was a shared marital point of view. I think it is best to not go overboard financially, briefly mention certain purchases that are made and leave the point alone until the items purchased are needed.
For example, we have several space heaters as a simple back-up plan and to compliment our main heating source. When we had problems with the main heating system, we were able to get these heaters out and boy were they useful! The house temperature was kept up until after we could get a 2nd opinion. The first man came out quick but had some tricks up his sleeve and tried to sell us a new heater, out of fear. Our second opinion, a real professional, came out and determined that we just needed a new sensor. By having back up heaters, we stayed warm when we had an issue and we weren’t desperate when the first technician tried to take advantage of us. Now that we had that issue, we decided to buy a propane back-up heater and quite a bit of propane. If this happens when the temperatures are lower, we should be fine. We didn’t talk about the heaters too much until after we were so happy to have them. This part of our preparation plan is just a positive memory; not a sour, over-debate d topic.
There have been several other times that forward thinking has proven to be advantageous for us. So many times it is something small that leaves a big impression. Something like a spare roll of quarters when a locker is needed. Maybe it is having plenty of toilet paper so you don’t run out. It could be having a flashlight readily available when the power goes out, extra propane when the grill consumes the last bit in the current tank, or extra food from our ‘larder’ if I forgot something at the store.
It is very important to discuss the benefits of being prepared after it has become a positive topic, rather than being overbearing before. This has helped open my spouse’s eyes to the need to have continually better preparations. Once some creature comforts fail, like heat, it becomes understood that having some extra food may be a good idea. Also, I have paralleled ‘preparing’ to other topics like the scout motto, “Be Prepared” as my husband achieved his Eagle Scout award when he was younger. For most people, the seeds of being prepared are there, they may just need some watering from time to time.
Best, – Nora in Indianapolis
Jim:
A gentleman asked how to get his wife involved. Speaking as a female prepper and survivalblog reader, it might simply help for her to know that she is not alone. It might be helpful to find a gun club, or another Christian couple who are into being prepared. Some women feel silly spending a lot of time and money on preparedness because most other people think it is silly or unnecessary, and some women feel funny because shooting guns and learning to hunt are considered to be “manly pursuits” by much of society. Having been referred to as “an NRA gun nut”, I understand that there can be some apprehension involved in committing to preparedness. Try making it a family activity, and even though it is very serious, that doesn’t mean it can’t be fun. I am involved with a small group of people, mostly from my church, who go shooting together and hunting and camping and all sorts of activities like that. We have a blast! But we also know that we can count on one another in a TEOTWAWKI situation. I think that my mom is much more involved now because it’s also something I am passionate about. She thought that preparedness was just a phase my dad was going through until she realized that I was every bit as serious about it as he was, and now she’s all for it! Don’t expect her to become Sarah Conner overnight, but give it time and patience, and try to find something simple to get her feet wet. Again, making it a whole family activity could make a big difference, and don’t lose the fun side of preparedness, of marriage, and of life in the Lord. – A Survival Sister in Christ
Dear James, and all:
I have gotten the same response from Christians about preparedness, and, in general, concerns over the state of the world. “I’m so glad God is in control,” etc. is common. Then they usually just move on with a smile, obviously unconcerned. I believe this is related to poor Biblical knowledge, or a misunderstanding about the role of “works” in the lives of Christians.
Primarily, believers do not always understand that America was founded on rights deemed to be given by our Creator, and is, therefore, a GIFT and under the expectations of Christian stewardship. While the Gospel is hope for all time, peoples and circumstances, it does not give us permission to become lazy with the blessings we’ve been given. Jesus was pretty clear in the parable of the talents: The Master is hard. The Lord does not look kindly on believers who “bury” what they have. To whit, “To whom much is given, much is required.” If we have a major event, then your good wife will be expected to follow the Biblical commands for hospitality even more so. Will she be prepared?
Please remind her that salvation is free, but the Lord also has expectations for us to become the “good and faithful servant.” That requires work. Sincerely, Gretchen O. – in Northern Illinois
. (The last third of my novel describes modern resistance warfare, in fairly good detail.)
.)
. We had seen some episodes in passing earlier in our marriage, but I finally rented the DVDs at one point to see what all the hubbub was about. Lesson learned: despite the Hollywood “angle”, we learned a lot and more importantly found out that we were each quietly prepping without mentioning it to the other. He has his specialties and interests and I have mine, and both of us were silently tackling them. Ahhh, the fun of two very independent newlyweds finally figuring each other out. <Chuckle>. I admitted I’d been stocking the pantry for more than just a rainy day and he admitted his interest in gear wasn’t just so we could try out camping sometime. We later found that his interest in things mechanical and my interest in topics “green” worked out quite nicely when he mentioned a preference for diesel engines and I brought up biodiesel – oh, the topics we’ve covered since.
by James Howard Kunstler