While many readers of SurvivalBlog might be hard-core, prepped to the nth degree, live off the land survival types like Mr. Rawles, I would suspect that most are much like myself: quiet suburban dwellers whose eyes have been opened by Mr. Rawles at SurvivalBlog and similar voices to the fragility of our modern intertwined civilization. However, my awakening and “journey” was begun without my most important companions: my lovely bride of seven years and our two very young daughters.
While I consider my wife to be one of the most resilient and resourceful individuals I have ever met, she shares a similar upbringing with most of America complete with its outlook on TEOTWAWKI: things like this can’t happen in Chicago/Illinois/America/The World. It’s a world view that I and I suspect many of the readers of this site once shared as well. Convincing her to take disaster preparedness seriously has become one of the most important tasks I have undertaken. Doing it in a way that doesn’t make me come off like a “nut” is a gentile and time consuming process.
I have found two effective methods to facilitate this: use real world examples to stress the need for preparedness and family activities to build skills critical for preparedness. It also doesn’t hurt that spending time together with my wife and children also strengthens our own familial bonds and is a lot of fun.
Using seemingly mundane real world examples of manmade and natural disasters can drive home many concepts to the skeptical spouse. For example, I convinced my wife of the practical need for a bugout bag by using a highway accident in a neighboring town. A tractor trailer carrying anhydrous ammonia had been involved in a multi-vehicle accident on I-55 and several thousand local residents had to be evacuated. I asked her a hypothetical: what would we do if that happened here, and we had only a few minutes to leave? I then posed a more sever hypothetical: what if we had to leave for several days because the refinery/chemical plant the next town over had a large accident (being an engineer really helped me drive this home to her)? Maybe we should fill a large suitcase with spare outfits, diapers, wipes, and. Wouldn’t it be good keep a storage bin filled with juice boxes, water bottles, crackers, snacks, mac-n-cheese and canned foods if we had to leave for a couple of days .. you know, so as not to be an imposition for the home we wind up crashing in for a couple of nights? Just in case.
After answering some questions and dispelling her belief that “things like that don’t happen” with more real world situations, she agreed it was prudent to take these seemingly small steps. And like every journey, the journey to preparedness begins with a few small steps.
The usefulness of a generator and some kind of alternate power supply was also communicated using another real world example, this one was a bit closer to home. A friend’s basement had flooded during a power outage costing them more than $10,000 in damage. I asked her another hypothetical: what of that happened to us? Perhaps we should look into some kind of emergency backup power supply for the sump pump and a “few” other household appliances? What about solar PV with a battery backup? (fun fact: did you know that lightly bruised PV panels can be had for free from road sign rental outfits … all you gotta do is ask the right person). Maybe you clear your schedule next weekend and we can do this together?
This kind of task killed two birds with one stone: we put in a valuable backup power supply, and we did it as a team, building skills (electronics, carpentry, cooperation, etcetera) that may one day prove quite useful.
The preparations she and I make together are usually never all the preparations my household makes. While “our” G.O.O.D. bag (for example) is packed with clothes, batteries (rotated periodically), food, toiletries, sleeping bags, and some cash, my “camping” rucksack contains fishing equipment, two sealed .308 battle backs, MREs, camping stove, 550 cord, fire making supplies, two Leatherman tools, shortwave radio, tarps and the like. “Our” workouts consist of jogging, bike riding, canoeing, and long walks with the kids while my workouts consist of free weights, boxing, and swimming.
Firearms and the skeptical spouse is a clear no brainer. I have always been an avid outdoorsman and hunter and when we met wife cared little for firearms. The reality of the situation is, and one that took little convincing, is that with the amount I am away from home for work (2-3 days a week) a situation may arise where an intruder may find his way into our home. As a responsible gun owner, I demand everyone in my house to familiarize and master firearm handling and usage as soon as they are capable. Her willingness to learn about firearms and become proficient with them crystallized when our first daughter was born. If your skeptical spouse has not yet come to the realization that although men and women are equal in the eyes of the law, laws are constructs of people and a large male intruder cares little for feminist theories of gender identity. A small diminutive woman can stop a NFL lineman with one careful or several hasty shots from a Model 1911. Learn them, respect them, and know that not only your safety but the safety of your children will rely on the ability and willingness to use them.
Do as much as your spouse is willing to, but don’t push them. Keeping things fun is a great way to keeping them interested. Building skills and preparedness can be made fun and does not have to be a chore.
I have also found gardening to be another critical skill that can be innocently portrayed as just another fun family activity. Picking wild berries, fruit, and asparagus (which are abundant and go unused by people in the forest preserves and public lands by me) and canning them into homemade jam/preserves/vegetables is a preferred alternative to spending a weekend afternoon on the couch, or worse, in the mall. (fun fact: did you know that while most people release the boney Northern Pike, they can be easily pickled for delicious meals and have long shelf lives). This was presented to my skeptical spouse as not just a “fun thing” to do with the kids (which it is, nothing cuter than seeing the little devils eat as many as they pick), but also as a way to save money and enjoy some beautiful spring and summer afternoons.
Craft projects are another avenue for skill building. I recently read an article here on SurvivalBlog about braiding parachute cord and we sit down occasionally and make bracelets and necklaces with our daughters. Sewing is skill I had very little knowledge of, and one where my wife actually taught me a great deal of practical sewing skills (hemming pants, sewing patches and buttons).
Some might say that my approach is deceptive and they have a point. However, considering the importance of the task I would rather build skills and preparedness prudently and cautiously, all be it slowly, then have my skeptical spouse think that this is just another one of my many eccentricities and write it off as such.
And remember, the best case scenario of being prepared is building useful skills, becoming more self reliant and spending quality time with your family and friends. The worst case, its is your family’s survival.