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In the histories I have read about the War between the States, Decoration Day got started by Southern and Northern Women, in the spring of 1865. The southern women had gone out to pay their respects to the dead in places (many of them!) in Virginia, and found gruesome battlefield skeletons not buried, and burials that were incomplete or poorly and hastily done. Wishing a more dignified and proper condition, the southern women returned home, got tools and help, and went back to the battle fields to right the conditions. When they arrived, they found northern women doing exactly that, and together they completed the sad and awful work. Women did this! G*d bless them forever for what they did. They came from all over the US to do this. Women are responsible for Memorial Day, and the dignity and propriety afforded not only our war dead, but all the dead.
“The town had made Memorial Day an annual, community-wide event, during which businesses closed and residents decorated the graves of soldiers with flowers and flags.” unlike today when it’s used as a reason for a sale by some.