I live in the suburbs of our nation’s capitol and of course I want to keep myself and family safe, so I have taken steps to mitigate and eliminate the dangers of my area. My challenge for a while was getting my new bride on-board with my preparations. She thought my supplies, guns and gear were “weird” and she chalked it up to my military experience and largely ignored it. If anyone else has a similar problem getting buy-in on prepping from their partners they may find this useful, it sure works better than arguing.
As Mr. Miyagi said in the Karate Kid 2 “Best way to block a punch is not be there.” Your advice to move and live in a rural setting is sound, but not practical for many people, so I do have the next best thing in a retreat on some family owned land. It is occupied by some older and retired family, so my preparations there both include and are guarded by them. I make a point to drive there and back by as many different routes as I can divine from a map reconnaissance that do not include the interstate highways. It takes more time, but it keeps us familiar with the routes and we notice any changes (Like a bridge that was getting rather rickety) that may influence our route choice if we need to G.O.O.D. She thought this was a weird way to travel, but I convinced her to go along with promises of new scenery, hidden treasures (Like a wonderful greasy spoon off the beaten track) and a more relaxed setting. I taught her how to read a military grid map and use a compass for “fun” demonstrating my old and valuable military skills. After she had been on all the routes though, she wanted to do the interstate to save time, but I knew traffic in our area is some of the worst in the country and decided to take advantage. On a holiday weekend, prime time we set out to follow the herd. It went exactly as I expected; a normal disaster. There was bumper to bumper stop and go traffic for hours. I let her drive this time and when the frustration set in, I threw in a “what if” scenario at her where a disaster had even more people trying to flee. There have been events in recent memory where people abandon their cars on the road and take flight on foot –however ill prepared they are to do so. She saw what I meant and recognized the value of both her new map reading skills and knowledge of the back roads. My back routes are no magic bullet, the Interstate was still faster, but the images I put in her head made her a bit less skeptical about my “weird” travel routines.
I visit there often, and take interest in the workings of the semi-retired farm. My wife loves it there, but thinks it strange I care so much about taking care of the place, like the time I was on-hand to help retrofit the windmill to make electricity once the water tower was full, or why we keep the grain silos in good shape even without a lot of livestock. We have a garden there, but a small one for now since my family isn’t really up to tending a large one. There are a few chickens and goats which are almost pets at this point but can certainly be put to real use if need be. The pond is stocked with fish and the woods give us a steady supply of firewood and game (But we don’t hunt much –yet.) A few weekends of sleeping in the quiet of the country and waking up to farm fresh eggs, bacon and sausage from a neighboring farm and fresh bread coming from the “weird” grain mill has her more excited about eating there than at the fancy restaurants around DC. We cook stews and barbeque outdoors, drink fresh water from the spring and pick though the garden for fresh vegetables. She learned some “weird” skills about canning and drying foods for storage from my aunt. Once we were married, I even let her into the secret back barn room that holds a family relic, which let’s just say has produced good cheer for over a hundred years. The “weird” country life became a vacation for her. I would like to live there full-time, but with the relic only producing good cheer and not cash like it used to (Too risky now!) I keep my city job.
She works in a government office building and a few times they have been locked down for potential outside threats –seems to be a normal disaster lately. Every time has luckily turned out to be nothing but it has put the thought of terrorism in the front of her mind. I pointed out to her a real emergency could last more than a day and the office vending machines wouldn’t keep everyone sustained for long. She then agreed to store some food and water –but nothing else I suggested in her office. After her office was issued and trained on some cheap disposable gas masks and she saw people making light of the flimsy things she realized the masks and extra filters I had in my office, car and home were not so “weird”. Sure enough she finally took the “prep” bags and all of their goodies I had made for her to her car and office.
One summer we got hit with a string of bad thunderstorms which had an uncanny ability to knock out our power for hours. This normal disaster gave me the chance to show her my generator and solar powered gear was not so “weird”. My generator kept the fridge/freezer cold, the sump pump going, the air conditioner cooling and even our computer & internet connection going. My travel solar setup kept our cell phones & “weird” 2 way radios charged as well as ran a radio to bring us news and entertainment. It rained so hard and so much the check valve on our sewer was forced to close, eliminating our ability to use the plumbing for a few hours. It didn’t last long enough to bother us, but my portable toilet and old army sanitation manual about latrines were no longer “weird”.
That same summer we were attending a barbeque at a neighbor’s when another normal disaster struck; my neighbor’s one propane tank went empty. She thought my overstock of these was “weird” until that day when I casually plucked one from my storage and loaned it to the neighbor –with still plenty to use for my own house.
Last fall some friends of ours walked in on a burglar robbing their home. The man had grabbed a kitchen knife and threatened them as he made his escape out the back door. Luckily our friends were not hurt, and my friends were suddenly asking me questions about home defense. I have an alarm system, two watch dogs, a safe for my guns and valuables and a concealed carry permit for the pistol I always have on me. My wife was already on board with the alarm system, just thought I was “weird” for training watch dogs, disliked my insistence she lock up her good jewelry in the safe and didn’t care for me carrying a gun much –until my friends had their encounter with crime. I bought her a pistol, taught her how to use it and sent her to a class to get her own permit. She now goes with me to the range and I have also taught her how to shoot my AR-15, Benelli M4, Benelli Super Black Eagle and Remington 700. She now knows at least how to shoot to defend herself and maybe get a meal. She came to her own realization that guns were like women’s shoes –different ones are required for every occasion. So our arsenal here and at our retreat isn’t “weird” anymore.
The first hard freeze of winter made another normal disaster when a water main in our area broke and the utility advised everyone boil their water for a day before drinking it. My “weird” supply of bottled water suddenly came in handy. I told my wife that my “weird” water filter, rain buckets, five gallon pails with lids and sturdy cart could all be used to supply us with safe and clean water from rain, pools and nearby stream if things lasted longer than our bottled water.
This winter afforded another teaching moment when we got sucker punched with 28” of snow. (That’s a lot for here). I drove her by the big box store and grocery stores, and pointed out the throngs of people scrambling to lay in supplies they should have already had. One store was out of milk, another was rationing eggs to be “fair”. Again I planted the seed of what would be happening in a real emergency. My “weird” hunker down supplies of food and other goods became less strange.
We were well prepared with quality snow shovels, ice scrapers and multiple 50 lb. bags of salt to dig out. I also have a “weird” large supply of firewood and kerosene heaters stored in the attic. She actually remarked about how secure she felt knowing we wouldn’t freeze even if the power went out for longer than my “weird” generator and fuel would last. For fun once we had dug out I took her to some home improvement stores and pointed out the empty shelves where these items had been a day before, and the desperate people searching for goods that simply were not there. She commented how everything in our area got “picked over” because of the large population here, so suddenly the seasonal shortages of Halloween Candy and Christmas decorations took on a more sinister quality for her.
These “normal disasters” as I like to call them serve as warnings and training opportunities I think she has finally gotten the message, and now she makes some choices that surprise me, like a large supply of feminine hygiene products that has showed up here and at the retreat. She was a fan of the famous money advisor, Dave Ramsey, before prepping and has correctly drawn corollaries from his advice –“Live like no-one else so you can live like no-one else.”