Letter Re: You May Be A Survivalist Redneck If…

Rourke, a SurvivalBlog regular contributor, sent the following:
* – Indicates they are original or modified by me
The other ones are off various web sites that have Jeff Foxworthy jokes.
Obviously the addition of Redneck Survivalist was from me
*If your MREs consist of Jerky, Slim Jims, Cheetoes, and Bud Light, you may be a Redneck Survivalist.
*If you have ever tried to grill Spam, …
If you have more electronic equipment in your truck than in your house, …
*If you think of pig manure as a valuable resource and you can think of several uses for it, …
*If you listen to the weather so you will know how much electricity you will have that day, ….
*If someone says Christmas ham, and you think you are getting a radio, …
If you have to go outside to get something out of the fridge, …
If the hood of your truck is higher than the roof of your house, …
If your tires are worth more than your truck, …
If your honeymoon involved time at a deer camp, …
If you always thought “Guns and Roses” was something you get for your anniversary, …
If your favorite restaurant has a gas pump in front of it, …
If your favorite cologne is Deep Woods Off, …
If your 23-channel CB radio is used to communicate with your family, …
If you’ve ever had a conversation about truck tires that lasted more than an hour, …
If you keep catfish in your aquarium, …
If you know how to milk a goat, …
If your flashlight holds more than four batteries, …
If your 5-year-old can rebuild a carburetor, …
If your wife’s best shoes have steel toes, …
If your idea of home security is keeping all the guns loaded, …
*If your idea of gun control means being able to hit what you aim at, …
*If you don’t know your Social Security number, but know 2nd Amendment, the Star Spangled Banner, and the Preamble to the Constitution word for word, …

JWR Adds: 
Let me know if you have any others to add to the list.  A tip of the hat to comedian Jeff Foxworthy, ( http://www.jefffoxworthy.com/ ) who inspired Rourke’s post.