Helping Friends and Family Gear Up, by L.D.L.

As I sit here this evening, I am watching the aftermath of recent Missouri and Alabama tornadoes, Midwest flooding and western fires on television.  In the southeast, hurricane season will be upon them and there is always the possibility of an earthquake throughout the US. The news carries stories of our county’s continuing financial decline and overwhelming debt. I watch as the value of gold, silver and other precious metals climb and the value of our dollar continues to drop.

The next segment of the news has reports of increasing gas prices, increasing taxes and increasing crime. The growing unrest in the Middle East threatens to push the cost of a gallon of gas to more than $6 not to mention destabilization of the entire region. No, we here in the US get comparatively little of our oil from the Middle East any longer, but that doesn’t stop the instability there causing our gas prices to rise here.

I live in a suburban Missouri neighborhood which has experienced very little crime over the years. If you listen to the local police scanner, crime in our area consists of the occasional DUI, Speeder or Petty Theft from an open garage of a kid’s bike. The police here will turn out if there is a report of a party or a house being toilet papered as a tenage prank.. Pretty boring from a law enforcement standpoint, but last weekend every Police Officer and Sherriff’s Deputy in the county were two streets over for a hostage situation. We recently had our first bank robbery and crime has begun to move out of the city, across the river and int to our quiet suburban neighborhood. As the economy breaks down, the crime rate goes up.

And yet, I remain hesitant to discuss preparing for TEOTWAWKI scenarios with my friends and neighbors. They like many people they would rather keep their heads in the sand and ignore reality than face something that monumental. They think that those who prepare are “a little loony”; a little over zealous. Even my own family thought that I might be a little over the top, that is until recently.

With all of the recent disasters they have had an epiphany. I have also changed how I approach the subject. Instead of talking about the proverbial  “when the Schumer hit the fan” situation, I now refer to the recent Earthquake in Japan or the Tornados that hit St. Louis to provide a reason for some basic preparation that they can identify with. Rather than looking at the really big picture, I can refer to the small picture and motivate my family and friends to make some preparations if only to cover the short term. Of course I recommend those preparations be able to support them for 7 to 10 days versus the usual 3, but even this is an easier lift than it used to be.

All of us have probably experienced this same feeling of awkwardness trying to convince those we love and care for to prepare for the inevitable.  But depending on how we frame our recommendations and our reasons determines if we can get their buy in. Done right, it will work. It has worked for me.

Once you get their (usually tentative) Buy-In, the next challenge is to get them to make appropriate preparations. You must help them tailor a Go Bag to not only their needs, but the most likely situations or possible disasters. Two guiding principles I try to follow are to make it familiar and make it as small as possible. For some reason, the smaller the kit, the more they will accept it.
In my situation my wife teaches at a school about 20 miles and across two major river bridges from our home. My daughter, on the other hand, goes to school at a local university and doesn’t have to cross any major bridges and is less than 10 miles away from home. So the kit I will build for my wife will be different than the one I build for my daughter.

To make my wife’s situation more challenging, she decided that after all of the minivans and Soccer-Mom cars she wanted a convertible sports car now that the kids are grown, so that is what she drives. A beautiful and dependable car, but it offers little security or ground clearance. Broken road material could bring this vehicle and her escape home to a screeching halt. Though not as small as some, but because it is a convertible it has very little trunk room. This means it has very little room for a Go Bag.

Now normally I would have a small bag in the car to get you to your bigger bag at home, but considering that if the bridges are down due to an earthquake, she may have to survive for quite a while with just this bag. Here the situation dictates a larger kit, but storage space limits it.

My only big advantage is that she usually carries a case of bottled water in her trunk. Other than that, though she likes to camp, (in a nice campground) the idea of survival is a bit beyond her. So, making the contents or her Go Bag very self explanatory and familiar will make it useable for her. Yes, it is limited and there is a bigger one at home, but you have to work within the parameters given.

With the contents of the bag, I included instructions with how to use the contents and the possible optional uses for each. Radio channels for the handheld radio in the kit and points of contact are listed. I also included short notes of encouragement. As someone who has taught wilderness survival for the past 38 years and urban survival for the past 20 years, I revert back to my training when I am faced with a situation. My wife, daughter, son and friends haven’t the training or experience that I have so they don’t have that to fall back on. Anything that I can do to lessen or relieve their anxiety and overcome their stress will greatly increase their probability of survival and success. Besides, the little notes will be appreciated by them especially if things get difficult.

By taking a different tack on the need for preparation, and then adjusting my expectations to meet my wife’s expectations, I was able to get her onboard. By making the kit contents familiar, I was able to make it user friendly. This results in making my wife more comfortable with the concept of survival in an emergency and reducing the expected anxiety.

As a side note I also include a few treats to help support morale. Things like small family pictures. For young Grandkids I include a small stuffed animal. A small, soft throw blanket can add comfort for her should she have to sleep in an unusual location, like her car. Including food that is familiar and she likes along with rationing instructions makes survival easier. A piece of candy is always a morale and energy booster. Remember, in a real emergency people will be scared and experiencing many emotions. Anything that you can do to mitigate those fears and lessen those emotions will go a long way to help them survive the situation.

As you probably know, it is not about gear, but knowledge for those who are trained. For those who are not, it is all about instructions. Helping family or friends prepare for a disaster is much harder than helping yourself. Where as you may and probably do work at learning all you can about preparedness and survival, the person you are helping usually has little or no knowledge so it will take some work to support them. It can be frustrating, but remain calm and charitable. What you do now will pay off in spades when the SHTF. Take your time; add a little knowledge here and there. When you can reference the survival use of a piece of equipment, do so. It makes the understanding of the use of the piece much easier and easier to recall when needed.
As you write instructions use simple clear instructions. Pictures go a long way to support clear understanding. Using familiar items decreases the fumble factor. If they can identify an item they are much more likely to succeed in its use; odd or unfamiliar items significantly increases anxiety. These items are always more likely to be discarded or left in the kit and not bothered with. One other tip I would make is to use the best quality items you can afford. In my personal Go Bag, I have Columbia River Knife and Tool (CRKT) fixed blade and folding knives. Yes, there are more expensive knives out there, but for the price, these are excellent and I would trust my life to these. Buying cheap may save a few bucks, but if the item breaks or fails to function when needed what is the real cost? Besides, you want to make things as easy as possible since everything else is going wrong. Don’t do anything to add to their concerns. Should the SHTF there will be enough to worry about.

I will mention firearms here as an example of adjusting your expectations. I am armed every day. I always have a small concealed carry pistol with me and I keep a larger fighting handgun in a gun vault in my truck. Because my wife teaches in a public school, she is unable to carry a firearm on campus so the compromise was a Taser. It is not the best option, but it is one of the compromises that you have to make sometimes. This is just one example of adjusting your expectations. Her Taser is backed up with a couple of cans of Pepper Spray, but that is the best we can do. In all reality, she is not really supposed to have those on school property, but it was a reasonable compromise. Sometimes compromise is good.

So the next time you want to introduce your family or friends to the ideas and concepts of emergency preparedness and urban survival, take a lesson from my experience. Carefully consider your approach. Make sure that you reference emergencies that they can identify with. Use emergencies that are likely and realistic for your location. Adjust your expectations to meet theirs. As you help them with their preparations, use supplies that are familiar and they can use (a Bic Lighter is much more familiar than a Blast Match for most people); so their chance of success with them is significantly improved. And lastly include instructions describing how, where and when to use each of the contents. A listing of local and out of area contact numbers reminds them to make the call if they can. Notes of encouragement are optional, but can’t hurt. Good Luck and God Speed.