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Letter Re: Choosing a Partner for a Lifetime of Preparedness

Dear Editor:

I have a response to Choosing a Partner for a Lifetime of Preparedness (A Cautionary Tale [1]), by Bob C. from Oct. 9, 2015. H is article brings out the idea that beauty is way more than skin deep, an idea that I totally agree with and often share with young people. My husband and I are in the ministry and we often deal with teens who have not been taught the value of selecting a mate based on other qualities besides physical attraction. So, I think I understand the author’s point.

I would just like to comment that in my opinion it goes even deeper than what was brought out in the article. I often discuss with young people that God has a plan for their lives including who they will marry. It is good for people to pray and seek the Lord in this decision. It is also good to have a list of qualities that you are looking for in a mate. The Bible teaches us that we are only to marry other Christians, so I think that should be at the top of the list. I encourage people not to settle for anything other than God’s best for them. We do need to remember that no one is a perfect person. Everyone has things to work on to improve. But in choosing a mate, it is important to see serious character flaws. Can this person be responsible for a family? Will they be faithful through good times and bad? Do I notice that they are already trying to control me while still dating? Do they seek the Lord with all their heart? Do they spend time in the Word and try to live by it, etc?

Also, I understand the value of medical training. And in today’s world many families end up needing two incomes. But, I would like to weigh in my opinion that I highly value the role that some women choose in not having employment in order to care for the family. This man may not have children. I don’t know. That makes a difference.

But I was a little bit bothered by the idea that if his wife was not in a good career, that he would have to provide for her financially and that she would be a liability. I believe that the Bible teaches something different. God never told the woman that she had to work outside the home. He certainly didn’t say that it would be wrong to do so. But the God-given responsibility to provide for the household is on the husband’s shoulders. He is to be the head of the home which actually makes him the chief servant. He is to love his wife as Christ loved the church, being willing to die for her if needed. In return, he can expect his wife to respect him and love him and honor him. In my opinion a marriage is way more than a financial and romantic partnership. It is two, becoming one in every area of life.

Thanks for reading, – Georgia Girl